PeteSpeers.com

The 5th Dimension - Energy: Part 2

In Part 1 of this series, we defined some basic expressions of masculine and feminine energy, both when expressed in a healthy way (the light side) and in an unhealthy way (the dark side).  I’m not interested in making  judgements about ‘good’ or ‘bad’ in this post - we’ll save Jung’s Shadow for another day.  You’ve probably started to notice some of these traits in yourself and others in both specific circumstances and as general tones.  In Part 2, we’ll discuss the most common combinations of energies in men and women.

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The plain and simple truth is that we all have some combination of masculine and feminine energy inside of us.  In fact, any person expressing an extreme polarity in any one side of these energies is probably either completely insane with disorder, or has ended up an axe murderer.  You probably lead with either masculine or feminine energy, but you have some healthy amount of the other energy which keeps you balanced, civil, and relatively happy.

Just as a quick example, is it possible for a masculine person to only express masculine traits and never express creativity, cooperation, listening, and openness?  Yes, it’s possible, but I can’t imagine this person surviving long or attaining anything close to a healthy, balanced life.

While it’s easy to assume that most men lead with masculine energy and a women lead with feminine energy, it’s far more complex than that, and therein lies the reason for this discussion.  Any man or woman can express either masculine or feminine energy depending on the energy they typically lead with, the complimentary or conflicting energy of the situation, and the demands of the situation itself.

The statistics approximately follow the 80-20 rule.  About 80% of men lead with masculine energy, and about 20% lead with feminine energy.  The same goes for women - about 80% lead with feminine energy and 20% with feminine energy.  For simplicity, I will assume for the remainder of these posts that we’re talking about the 80% of men who lead with masculine energy and the 80% of women who lead with feminine energy.  The most interesting dynamics come into play when a person who typically leads with one type of energy expresses the other type of energy.

We’ll take these assumptions for granted as we move forward to Part 3, where we discuss how masculine and feminine energy flow and dance in relation to one another in both harmony and conflict.

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The 5th Dimension - Energy: Part 1

This is part 1 of a ?-part series taking a look at people from an ‘energy’ perspective.  Part 1 seeks to give a basic definition of the traits of masculine and feminine energy.  We’ll build on this foundation in future posts to address the balance of masculine & feminine energy in any one person, the effect of upbringing & single-parenthood, nurturing masculine or feminine energy in another, conflicts and overcompensation.

We’ll also explore the basic dynamic of the relationship between a masculine being and feminine being: for example, in order for the feminine to open up in a feeling, flowing, nurturing, and receptive freedom, it must trust in the complimentary masculine purpose, clarity, leadership, and loyalty.

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Feminine - the light side:

Openness
Receptive
Listening
Nurturing
Giving
Flowing
Feeling
Community & fellowship
Supporting
Cooperating
Creative
Intuitive
Visionary
Fullness

Feminine - the dark side:

Weak
Insecure
Tentative
Needy

Masculine - the light side:

Presence
Purpose
Leadership
Structure
Planning
Accomplishment
Winning
Independence
Clarity
Closure & resolution
Rational
Direct
Practical
Assertive
Reliable
Trustworthy
Protective
Emptiness
Eager
Outwardly helpful
Persistence
Loyalty

Masculine - the dark side:

Harsh
Overly competitive
Violent

Stay tuned for Part 2.

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I Am Dr. Phil - And You’re BORED.

DISCLAIMER:  Analyze at your own risk!  There’s theory, and there’s real life.  Be careful what you do with too many rules, and please see the very last point of this post for THE #1 LEARNING I’ve gotten so far.

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Ok, so I’m obviously Dr. Phil, but I occasionally play Dr. Phil on TV.  The truth is I’m a psychology nut, and I love to think about how people interact and what makes things go well or poorly.

Over the years, through observing people and talking with people with much more life experience than I have, I have stumbled upon a number of ideas that, while none of them are completely or always true, seem to be reoccurring themes around successful relationships.  I’ve broken them down into two categories for now - 8 Ways to Kill Boredom in a Relationship, and 3 Relationship Killers.

Are these BOGUS?  Post a comment below and let me know what you think.

8 Ways to Kill Boredom in a Relationship

1.  Continually getting to know & understand each other

2.  HAVING A BLAST in ways that only the two of you can

3.  Helping each other be their best

4.  Giving to others - together (volunteer, give to charity, etc.)

5.  Learning new things - together (learn to dance, cook, skydive, etc.)

6.  Traveling & exploring - together

7.  Continually building and demonstrating trust, honesty, and positivity.

8.  Having emotional experiences - together (I’m not talking about getting all sad and sappy and crying together, I mean do things that are fun, exhilarating, exciting, interesting, things that stir up emotion in both of you!)

BONUS!! - 3 Relationship Killers

1.  Not acknowledging imperfection in yourself, and never learning how to integrate & transcend it directly relates to your ability to deal with imperfection in others in a healthy way.

2.  Coming into a relationship intending to ‘get’ things out of it rather than coming into a relationship ready to ‘give’ to the other person.

3.  Over-analyzing and talking about the relationship, rather than HAVING THE RELATIONSHIP.

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Simple, Random Gratitude - Part 2

Simple, Random Gratitude - Part 2

I’m thankful for…

5/15/09
…paper and pen
…anticipation
…Spanish

6/3/09
…Chinese food
…the ability to relate to the experience of a friend
…anticipation
…intelligent women
…bikes!
…carbon fiber
…dental floss
…great jokes

6/9/09
…moments of self-awareness
…puzzles
…complicated people
…the chase
…anxiety
…reunion with good friends
…songs that get stuck in my head
…people I can’t stop thinking about

6/15/09
…bacon
…board games
…surprise fireworks
…beaches
…perfume

6/16/09
…my guy friends
…trust
…new ideas
…good shoes
…surprising people
…happy surprises
…fireworks
…the possibility of losing someting very valuable
…the unknown
…anxiety
…waiting for a call or message
…off-days

6/17/09
…a lot to say
…weekends
…instant messages
…coming home after the battle

6/24/09
…wanting
…dissonance
…uncertainty
…grilling out
…hanging out with the boys
…new bikes
…old bikes
…hair

6/29/09
…red wine
…fireworks
…holidays
…sunny mornings

7/7/09
…a new routine
…mornings
…dresses
…shoes
…decisiveness
…green tea
…vacations
…dreaming
…mountains
…smooth roads
…sunshine
…the past
…the future
…good smells
…good beer

7/8/09
…stretching
…mountain biking
…summer
…Jazz in the Park
…old friends
…birthdays
…grilling out
…an eager helper
…my friends

7/14/09
…surprises
…colors
…big smiles
…green tea
…sunglasses

7/19/09
…anticipation
…breathing
…good music
…waiting
…the unknown

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Pete Speers: EXPOSED!! [CENSORED]

This is an ACTUAL note I sent a friend - here is a glimpse into the inner-most depths of Pete Speers.

I’ve gotten a number of requests for a post about how to get started with Triathlons, Ironman in particular.  While I claim to be no expert, the following details my learnings of my journey to finishing Ironman 2008.  FYI I will be doing Ironman 2010 in Madison - I hope to see you there!

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If you get the puppy reference, I'll buy you lunch.

First of all, a HUGE thanks to my dear friend Chris for the inspiration to get started.

[Note: my friend is a marathon runner, so that is the context for this letter.]

Cover your childrens’ eyes and ears, here goes:


dear [CENSORED],

basics: if you sign up, i will sign up, too. actually i’m tentatively planning to do 2010 anyway. you must sign up 1-year in advance. the monday after this year’s race, everyone lines up early in the morning, so take the day off of work. there is an online registration, but i wouldn’t risk it in case the system is down. the race sells out within a few hours, at most. cost ~$400.

swim: i started swimming due to a kind offer from my buddy [CENSORED] who had taken some swim classes during college and had done a few shorter triathlons in the past. we have access to a fitness center with a pool through work, so we started swimming late fall the year before ironman. when i started i couldn’t even swim two lengths without stopping to rest and tread water. he gave me some pointers on technique, and after a few weeks, i got relatively comfortable in the water. so we swam 2 to 3 mornings per week for about 10 months pre-race. the swimming part was definitely the most challenging part for me.

another thing that was very helpful for my swim was attending a swim clinic. i would recommend that you attend as many as possible - you can get 1-on-1 recommendations on technique and the drills that will help most with your natural technique. i found a local group called TriFaster (http://trifaster.freeservers.com/) which holds clinics in the milwaukee area. i highly recommend that you find some clinics near you. Active.com has a good directory, for example http://www.active.com/page/Event_Details.htm?event_id=1660479&assetId=d90e35a9-1606-41ca-b2ec-c330a3c8ae72

others have recommended joining a ‘masters’ swim group. basically these are groups of folks who may or may not complete, but have weekly practice sessions and experienced swimmers on hand to give you tips.

i’ve also checked out some YouTube videos http://www.youtube.com/results?search_type=&search_query=triathlon+swimming&aq=f

bike: the bike was my favorite part, maybe because it’s fastest and lowest impact, and if you get tired, you can just coast without sinking! you can really just get on a bike of any kind and start riding. i started riding about a year and a half from race day, on a hand-me-down road bike that was too small, with 10-mile-rides that kicked my butt.

through the winter, i road inside on the trainer (http://www.performancebike.com/shop/Profile.cfm?SKU=17878&item=40-1775&slitrk=search&slisearch=true), which can be pretty boring. i would throw on a dvd or some tunes to pass the time. some folks really like trainers because it’s a controlled environment where you can really fine-tune the intensity of your workouts. i still say - boring but necessary. i would say that keeping up the intensity during the winter was the single thing that allowed me to hit the ground running when spring came.

the big debate for the bike is triathlon vs. road bike, where the main difference is geometry. a tri bike puts you farther forward and preserves your quads for the run, while sacrificing a bit of climbing power. however, i would prioritize a full carbon fiber bike over aluminum - i believe this is more important than geometry, as you can always take advantage of the bike’s adjustments to get a good riding position. a full carbon bike will absorb bumps in the road like a dream, and over 112 miles, this is EXTREMELY important. your main obstacle (or at least mine, and many others’) will be to stay comfortable enough to stay down in the aero bars (available on road and tri bikes) rather than sitting up to stretch your sore arms and back.

for training rides, check out http://www.beginnertriathlete.com/ where you can find groups in your area and also in the race area (you doing madison?) to ride with. training for 112 miles is virtually impossible by yourself. also talk to your local bike shop, who will more than likely organize weekly rides.

check craigslist - now is a great time to buy a bike. to figure out what the best bikes are, check out http://www.roadbikereview.com/cat/latest-bikes/triathlon-bike/PLS_5677_913crx.aspx and sort “by Rating”. i have a Valdora PHX Carbon, formerly the top-rated tri bike on the market (darn Cervelo P2!). you can also find bikes and trainers and parts at garage sales, where many people are getting rid of bikes that have been sitting in the garage for years. you can also get GREAT bike deals at http://chainlove.com and http://bonktown.com

get AT LEAST a basic fitting at a bike shop (or from a pro like your dad!)

run: i think you’ve got the run pretty much covered. pace yourself throughout the swim and bike. many say that the ironman is just a marathon, with a long commute before hand. and KEEP GOING! there was a defo group at one of the aid stations last year - great to see them norski purple!

training plan: i recommend checking out the FREE 20-week ironman training plan at http://www.beginnertriathlete.com/ this is the one i used. i also recommend monitoring most of your training based on heart rate. this is especially vital on race day for pacing. i capped myself at 160 bpm, which is significantly lower than my typical training heart rate of 170-180 (my heart rate is naturally a bit higher). the other alternative is using a power meter on the bike, but (A) it’s EXPENSIVE, and (B) you can only use it on the bike.

nutrition: check out “Sports Nutrition for Endurance Athletes” by Monique Ryan http://www.amazon.com/Sports-Nutrition-Endurance-Athletes-Monique/dp/1931382964/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1239666241&sr=8-1 for sport-specific and distance-specific nutrition plans tailored to morning or afternoon/evening sessions. for beverage, get tubs of gatorade powder. much cheaper than pre-made bottles, and you can vary the concentration for ultra-hot days. also, check out accelerade for recovery beverage, and endurolytes for long workouts and race day. gu and powerbars, also.

tapering and race day (you know this already): i recommend following the 20-week training program mentioned above. don’t push it a few weeks before the race, you won’t be any faster on race day, and you’ll risk injury. be ready for ANY type of weather on race day. stick to your heart-rate plan and pace yourself. as the 20-week plan recommends, practice your race-day nutrition on your long training days

try yoga for recovery days.

3 BASIC KEYS - (1) stay injury free, basic but vital. (2) make sure your clothes and equipment fit. basic, but also vital. (3) use good technique. again, basic but vital.

i’m sure i’ll think of more, hit me back if you have questions.

for some inspiration, check out http://www.youtube.com/results?search_type=&search_query=ironman+wisconsin&aq=f